Texts From Last Night (TFNL)

[Bill]

Ok so if you havent heard of this website its pretty funny.. basically people send in their random funny texts from the night before. some of them are hillarious.. here is the site.. you can download the app.. Ill try to post some here and there
Best Nights of All Time

i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...



i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"

i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...

I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.

I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed



Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more

so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true

he said he didn't have a condom.

• (415):
  
  and you said?
  
  (510):
  
  that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
  
  
  
  I would do horrible things to your vagina.
• (978):
  
  Prove it.