The Christmas Goat Story

Keelboater

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THE CHRISTMAS GOAT STORY

By Dave Barry

I really love the holiday season because it has so many traditions. One of my most cherished traditions is telling the story of The Christmas Goat each year. I first heard this story from my Uncle Jeff, who swears it’s all quite true.

The Christmas Goat Story concerns a family that lived in Virginia some years ago. There was a mother, a father, three sons, and one daughter - the youngest child in the family. They kept a pet goat out back, and one very unusually cold Christmas Eve, the oldest son went out to feed it. But when he got out there, he made the grizzly discovery that after many good years of service it had been called up to goat heaven. “The goat was not only dead†states Uncle Jeff, “but it was frozen solid in the upright position!â€

The boy went in to tell his father. Realizing the full situation, his father became very anxious about not having his young daughter see the goat. She was extremely fond of it and he didn’t want to see her Christmas completely ruined. He couldn’t bury the goat because the ground was frozen solid like a rock, so after some thought he and his three sons decided to load it into the back of their station wagon and take it to the local animal shelter. Unfortunately, upon arrival at the shelter, the manager told them that they did not accept animals that were in the deceased mode.

So they continued to drive in circles with the dead goat, wondering how or where they could get rid of it. It was getting very late, and they began to get very desperate when the magic of Christmas brought forth the kind of miracle that restores your faith in the holiday season. They drove past a church with a life sized outdoor Nativity scene that featured LIFE SIZED ANIMALS.

“Light bulbs went off in all of their heads simultaneously as their car came to a screeching halt†states Uncle Jeff. “Then within the next few moments, the Nativity scene had acquired a new touch of realism, and the station wagon, now goat free, was homeward bound just as Santa began making his roundsâ€. So you see? It was a very Merry Christmas after all :)………..well…… at least until the thaw came. :eek:
 

F/V First Team

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Reminds me of this

mDMRV.jpg
 

Toolate

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When you say stuck in the snow I think you mean a couple guys stuck it in the snow. Used to know a guy who ran a snow plow for NY State and hit a few herds of deer at 50 or so which makes me think this could be a natural occurrence but I think not.

Great pic.

SOrry to hijack Keel. Would the family in the goat story be anyone you know?
 

captjohn

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I suspect alcohol may have something to do with that picture. As in someone found it and thought it would look funny if we stand it up! The top of the animal looks like it was eaten, I would think, other than a vulture, they would have started from the bottom up if it died in that position.
 

Keelboater

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Team 1 - WTF?! Where do you come up with these pics? :D

Toolate - No relation or connection with anyone in the story. It was written about 18 years ago and appeared in the local paper. Thought it was kind of funny so I clipped it out and saved it.
 

Toolate

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He has dozens of these pics! What kind of guy are you? :rolleyes:

image.jpg
 

Keelboater

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I wanna see the "Free Lobster Boat" photo! There must be one. Granted, CL has made offers in the past, but I'll bet FT has one that is....... unique?
 

Keelboater

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He has dozens of these pics! What kind of guy are you? :rolleyes:

Judging by the signs and balloons, he is obviously a concerned citizen who cares deeply about animals. When was the last time anyone here stopped to help a dead cat find a new home? And that wasn't just any cat. Turns out that was our cat. My 4 year old grandson recognized it immediately. Now we finally have some closure knowing that he found a new home for him. Thanks FT! ;) :roll:
 

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What can I say, I'm all heart.

Tossing up a few photos of what others do to unfortunate roadkill is one thing, putting up a photo of a boat that has succumbed to events outside of the control of its owner, that's just lower than a snakes belly.
 

Toolate

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Judging by the signs and balloons, he is obviously a concerned citizen who cares deeply about animals. When was the last time anyone here stopped to help a dead cat find a new home? And that wasn't just any cat. Turns out that was our cat. My 4 year old grandson recognized it immediately. Now we finally have some closure knowing that he found a new home for him. Thanks FT! ;) :roll:

Pretty sure there is a theme developing here. Cat is the 2nd mention of a dead pet in the house for you Keel... The goat was you just come clean. We wont judge.
 

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